Ryder won’t be with us much longer. But she is here with us now, so waiting for her to pass is a vigil. Last night she would not settle. She kept wanting to go out. It was snowing and raining out, but Pete, who tended to her, put her out anyways. Pete speculated that she was in pain. He gave her a sedative, a larger dose than she needed. This knocked her out.

This morning she was lying on the wood floor in the living room. I thought she was dead, but Pete first felt her heart, and then I felt it. It was pounding. Her limbs were cold, which means the heart was working very hard to get blood to these extremities. This is called tachycardia.

Pete took off for work this morning and took Shadow with him. She was puzzled and did not want to be around Ryder. I left at 12:15 p.m. It had been snowing and raining all night. It was slushy outside. The drive to town was what I call a “white-knuckle ordeal” – Murphy was solid slush and Buffalo Mine was partial slush. Buffalo Mine was more dangerous because it has so many twists and curves.

The Glenn Highway was also slow going. I have learned that going slow is the best option. So this is what I did, coming and going.

Had a handful of volunteers in today – I did not tell them about Ryder because this would have dampened the cheerful mood. I did tell Leslie, who is back at work having finished (finally) jury duty.

The drive home was worse than the drive into the former banquet room of the historic Eagle Hotel. I was of course wondering if Ryder would still be alive – she was/she is. However, she is not going to recover - -she’s lost all her body strength and has no interest in eating. I remember when Rainbow was on her way out – she ate Cheez Whiz.

All day I’ve felt sad. I guess I am grieving. It’s odd to grieve prematurely but I am absolutely 100 percent sure that Ryder will be dead by morning. If not, we’ll have Zack give her an assist. I would like for her to stay alive long enough for us to have her euthanized at home.

Oh, early on I got a call from the oral surgeon – my appointment date was changed from December 16 to tomorrow. This is a little soon, but the procedure would have to be done anyways.

Of course, I feel bad about Ryder. What I feel most bad about is the fact that I’ve been too busy to spend a lot of time with her lately. If I had, I’d know her better and we’d be closer. I suspect that tomorrow I’ll be writing her eulogy. A few days ago, Pete dug a hole up on the hill near the upper cabin. So her grave site is ready. We have three other dogs buried there – Bootleg, Jenna, and Rainbow. Shadow is not going to be buried there for a long, long time.

Next: 278. 10/21/26: Hubba Hubba