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July 27, 2020: Sleep

Being able to fall into bed after a long day, then fall into a deep sleep for eight to ten hours is, in itself, a good reason to be alive. Sleep invigorates. It also puts the subconscious on nodding terms with the conscious. Dreams are the tip of the iceberg – we recall some dreams when we wake up, but not all of them.

I suffer from insomnia. If I’m so fortunate to fall back asleep in the early morning hours, I dream and then feel rested. If I have to get up, I know that I’ll be dragging myself around for the rest of the day. This is a terrible way to start the day.

I’ve been told that a ten-minute nap is as invigorating as a good night’s sleep. This is called Power Napping. The concept of Power Napping is pure and utter bullshit. It takes at least 15 minutes to fall asleep and then several more hours in which to recoup one’s losses. Some, like my father, actually cultivated the art of napping. But then he put three hours or so a day into this task. This is, in my estimation, time wasted. Life is too short to spend the middle portion in bed.

I might be able to nap in a hammock. I’ve never tried it. I think we have a hammock, but we lack the proper trees to tie it to. If so, it’s in the black hole

Painting by Jacqueline Welch

I know why he napped. Like me, he felt unsettled in the late afternoon hours. This is very hard to explain, but between the time between 3 and 6 p.m. was a low point for him and also for me. Maybe I got this from him. 6 p.m. and later is evening – it is of little consequence whether the day’s expectations have or have not been met.

My father and I differed in that I have always refused to succumb to napping. I simply find something to do, something that usually involves considerable physical activity, like riding a horse or walking a dog.

What I hate most of all are dreams in which I think I’m awake but I’m not. I can’t then move my body. The only thing I can do is wait until I wake up. I haven’t had one of these kinds of dreams for years. They are very unsettling.

I know its going to be a good writing day if for the first few hours upon awaking, I feel groggy. I don’t drink coffee or caffeine tea – this would just put an edge on the grogginess.

Today, at the time in which I napped, I went cross town and spent time with my friend Heather. We did horse agility with her horse, Rio. Heather is now working at home. I should ask her if she ever gets tired, and if so, does she takes naps?

Down in Mexico, people call naps Siestas. Maybe I could indulge if naps were called such, and everyone took one. Maybe. But I suspect that I could not easily give up bulldozing, no matter what it might be called.

Next: 208. 7/28/20: Once a Teacher, Always a Teacher

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