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November 5, 2018: Darkness Descends

Grr, grrr, grr, grr, grr and grr, grrr, grrr, grrr. I have such a hard time with it – the onset of darkness and the loss of daylight savings time. I come inside when it gets dark – right now about 5:30 p.m. I have things I can do, but I feel claustrophobic, knowing that it will be pitch black out until I go to bed, which will be in 5-6 hours. What gives? The sun has been shining brightly lately, which does take the edge off, but there is still an edge.

The hardest part of all is having less time to work and play with the horses. We do not have an arena or barn with lighting, nor do we have any sort of motion detectors. I go outside and do the evening

Fairbanks Ice Festival
Horses at Fairbanks Ice Festival a couple years ago

cleanup, usually around 10:30 p.m., wearing a headlight. In a few weeks, I’ll also be doing the same in the mornings.

I could spend my entire day outside with the critters and then, most likely they’d get the attention that they see as their dog given right. But morning times are best for me for getting indoor work done

Today I worked on Forks and I did my body awareness work. Then I went outside and assisted Pete in splitting and getting wood into the shed. Then I went to strength training class. I got home and had just enough time to take Raudi out on the trails. I had a wonderful ride – she is now a dependable steady eddy riding horse, just like Tinni. But I did not get any of the others out. When I got to feeling bad about this, I reminded myself that first of all, I have to finish Forks, particularly if I am to continue to forge an identity as a writer. And I do have other projects that I want to get going on.

And I have to keep doing the body awareness/strength training work. I am continuing, at home, to do the Feldenkrais work, which complements the gym based strength training. I feel better mentally and physically when I focus on these activities. Also, I am a much better rider when I do both. I could see that today – my hips were looser and so I was better able to encourage Raudi to turn using her hindquarters. I was also moving my hips, shoulders, and pelvis in unison with one another, which served to better keep Raudi and me in balance with one another.

The is an upside of the lack of light. Late at night, when it’s dark, it’s very peaceful out. The light comes from a variety of differing sources, sometimes the stars, sometimes the moon, and sometimes the northern lights are out. There is some light pollution here, but since they closed the Sutton prison, far less. I also am, when it’s dark, able to see less, so I am more apt to hear the quietude.

Still, I am counting the days until December 21, the winter solstice. Then we’ll be over the hump for the days will then again be getting longer.

Next: 310. 11/6/18: Morning Has Broken

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