I now have post clinic pre-competitive trail ride anxiety. I am in a liminal space. I am in a vortex. I am in the eye of a hurricane. I am surfing the wave. I am going over the jump. Enough. No analogy is quite fitting. All I can do right now is describe.

The clinic went okay. I have no idea right now what I learned. There were too many people and not enough time. And the material was not presented by the clinician in such a way that I, the average horse owner, could fully grasp it. And this was with me reading his book beforehand.

The very best thing that I did was encourage Pete to take the clinic. He came away feeling better about doing minor

trimming on our horses’ hooves. And I came away knowing the rationale for barefoot trimming.

I do know that I need to make some equine dietary changes. More copper, more zinc. This, Pete and I agreed, is going to enable our horses to grow more sole. The clinician was right – nutritional changes come from within, and they do not happen overnight.

Should we enlist our veterinarian to take radiographs of Tinni’s front legs? If we do this, our farrier will better be able to trim the hooves because he will have a better idea of where the internal structures are and where they are currently located. A thin sole is a bad thing, and so we must address this issue.

Lots to think about here, and this does make me anxious, as does what’s ahead – the CTR. Now (I decided) is the time to be flexible and start to go with the proverbial flow. I have quite a bit to do, but Pete has even more to do. The best thing I can do is give him an assist, physically and mentally. I will waste my energy and his if I get bent out of shape about inconsequential things.

I might even write that last statement on a card and carry it with me. I get bent out of shape out of habit. I can do better. This is going to give me more time to get other things done. And the more I get done beforehand, the more relaxed I will be at the end of the week.

I have now stood here (at my standing desk) for a few minutes, unable to continue because the essence of this dispatch is in the above paragraph. Physically, I can take breathing breaks. And I will resume doing my body awareness exercises, which are meditative. And I will eat well this week – lots of vegetables are going down. Pete and I had said that it would be a good idea to get up early the next few days because the last two days were killer. But tomorrow we are going to sleep in. Right now, at 11:21 p.m. he is working on solving a computer problem – something to do with the router.

And I need to keep this in mind. Pete Ramey signed my book “For the horses.” This is so apt. We need to take care of them. But in order to do this we must take care of ourselves.

Next: 204. 7/23/18: Look Outward and Grin