charge didn’t need any help with the production end of things. One woman was on vacation, but another was doing both her own job and filling in for the person missing. So, no moving microphones up or down, or moving podiums. So, it being a library, I got a good book, sat in the children’s section, and read it. Just Kids is Patti Smith’s memoir of Robert Mapplethorpe. I read it during rehearsal and during the first half of the show. I did catch the only funny part of the show, four women dressed as sumo wrestlers, dancing.
Okay. Second Half. I am to fill in for a woman who was not there, and be a bag woman interacting with a cashier. I was dressed in a bag outfit. My one line was “breathe mints.” I understand that in comedy that there is a straight person and a funny person. I attempted to be the funny person. Alas, the actress who was cashier must have thought that she was the one who was supposed to be funny. I can understand why – she was the show prima donna, in more than half of the skits. I was supposed to request breath mints. I requested suppositories.
I attempted to ad lib a bit. Ohh, the looks she gave me. It was so bad that my parting words into the mike were “She usually isn’t such a mean person.”
My inner voice told me to stick around until the end. But I ignored my inner voice and got out of that place as fast as I could. Yes, I was angry mainly because I wasted five hours of my time, five hours that I could have spent working on my book. Five hours frittered away by theatre wannabees.
Never again, never again, never again. I hope that I burned a bridge behind me because I do not want to go back in the opposite direction, ever again.
One bright moment – my friend Pamela and her sister were there. Lovely people, two amazing sisters with some wonderful stories. I wish that we’d instead gone out for dinner together. But there will be other times to do fun things with them.
Next: 320. 11/19/17: Move Along Little Doggies