It is not true that people stop pursuing their dreams because they’re getting older. They grow old because they stop pursuing their dreams. -- Gabriel Garcia Marquez
I haven’t had many idea days in the past year. Actually, I’ve had ideas but I have not noticed them. I’ve been too busy doing other things besides writing, one of these things being Anatomy and Physiology. Writing, coming up with workable ideas and the like, requires continuity of thought. And continuity of thought requires that I set aside a certain amount of time each day for writing. Writing in the mornings, for two hour stretches, works best for me. I can and do the same thing in the evenings, but the ah ha moments are few and far between.
If and when I resume writing, ideas begin to materialize like solutes in solvents. These ideas materialize when I’m doing other things, like shoveling shit. They also materialize when I’m in a half-asleep/half-awake dream state. And they also materialize when I’m writing. At these particular moments in time, I feel both euphoric and depressed. I see the possibilities in everything, but there is too much everything.
The above-mentioned quote by Gabriel Garcia Marquez now resonates with me. It is so true. When one ceases to pursue their
dreams, they become like a vegetable in the crisper. The vegetable/person shrivels up, becomes useless, and in time, loses its purpose.
My short term memory is not as good as it used to be. I became aware of this when I was taking Anatomy and Physiology. I had, when I took tests, limited recall. I missed questions that I should have had the answers to. It was very disconcerting. I have since been heartened by the fact that my middle and long term memory functions don’t seem to be deteriorating. I noticed yesterday in working on an article for the Centered Riding newsletter, a place where I draw upon my knowledge of anatomical and physiological principles, that I was able to recall where the needed information was, and look it up.
I’m also still able to problem solve. Got a doozy here (this is a term that my mother and grandmother used to use). I don’t know whether or not I should focus on one or on all six of Sally Swift’s riding-related principles, these being breathing, soft eyes, centering, alignment, grounding, and clear intent. I am fairly far along in writing about the six principles, but I had this idea that I might instead just write about one principle, which is breathing and the respiratory system. I’m stuck, stuck, stuck, stuck, stuck. This is a bad feeling, but of course it is better than no feeling at all. There are no related feelings when one is practicing writing avoidance.
Well, this morning I am going to write a blurb for Brit (the owner of Saddle Up Arena), which I hope she’ll post on Facebook, saying that I’m available to teach riding lessons. I’m also going to email my friend Heather and see if she’s interested in taking lessons. I had this idea – it came to me this morning when I was in a half-awake state. I want to do a preliminary lesson in which I focus on breathing and mounting the horse. This may very well be the focus of my Centered Riding article.
What do to with this article – a tough decision all the way around. I am swaying back and forth, like a distraught circus elephant.
Next: 118. 12/31/16 The Home Life: Preparing for the New Year