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January 30, 2015: Torpor

Defined, torpor is “a state of physical or mental inactivity; lethargy, sluggishness, inertia, inactivity, lifelessness, listlessness, languor, indolence, passivity, somnolence, weariness.” The statement that followed these definitional terms reads “the feeling of torpor may last for weeks.”

I looked up the above definition – was amazed to find that so many words that describe my current state of being are so poetic, especially inertia, as in “the inertia of one’s spirit,” indolence, and somnolence. These words just roll off one’s tongue, most likely because otherwise, they’d be describing a differing state of being.

Torpor – early on today this word, which described exactly how I felt, came to mind. I subsequently felt a grim sense of self-satisfaction. Physically, I felt just fine. But mentally I felt under the weather. All that needed doing required more energy than I appeared to have on hand. I was lacking in energy. Everything I had to do was twice as hard as usual and took three times as long as it normally does.

I fought off the impulse to climb back into bed and go back to sleep, although this was what I most wanted to do. I can be extremely disciplined, and this was one of those times. Things had to get done – I was just a conduit for getting them done.

The root cause of my torpor might be weather-related. It’s been somewhat cold lately, the temperature generally being slightly above or below freezing. This time of year I begin feeling like I’m ready for spring. Undoubtedly, if I went to Cuba, I would not feel this way. I keep thinking about how nice it would be to dash out of the house without having to don my Refigerware suit, hat, glove, and boots. This takes considerable time, as does my having to break the ice in the horse water buckets, scoop out the solid stuff, and refill the buckets. In addition, I must, when Pete’s not around, bring in wood, start a fire, feed the dogs, and tend to the goats and chickens.

Before and then after breakfast, I forced myself to put on innumerable layers – this actually made me feel a bit upbeat, for I knew that I’d then remain warm once outside. I added (to my existent mode of outdoor dress) a second layer, top and bottom, of long underwear. I also put on my thick wool sweater. Add to this, outer garments, i.e., gloves, hat, socks, boots. The latter items were warm because lately I’ve taken to putting them on the enamel water pans on the woodstove.

Pete and I took Hrimmi and Tinni for a walk this morning. I then finished up my If Wishes were Horses proposal. It’s now in Pete’s hands. It’ll be a while before he reads it because he has so many other things to tend to.

I got Raudi out after finishing up my proposal. I saddled her up, and then did some obstacle work with her. We went through the S poles, which was set up as a labyrinth. We also went through the saw horses wove through the cones, and pulled the shower curtain (which was attached to a lead rope) up and down the driveway. And, of course we did our usual hula hoop practice.

After, I took Raudi and the dogs out on the trail. The sun was then shining brightly. The trail had set up nicely. It was a wonderful outing. We saw two moose. Raudi was attentive but not reactive. There was a spring to her step the entire time. We did more obstacle work when we got back home. We worked on sidepassing and backing through the L poles. We’ll need to work more on these things if we’re to do the trail trials. This is something that right now is up in the air.

Major torpor set in when it came to doing the late afternoon chores. That is, filling the water buckets, scooping poop and hauling it up the hill in the toboggan, cleaning up after the goats and chickens, putting the obstacles away, taking the dogs up to the house, and hauling goat hay up to the shed. Oh yeah, and then I had to bring in wood. Once done, I knew that I was over the torpor hoop for today. The temperature is supposed to go up, so I don’t think that I’ll feel as low energy tomorrow.

Next: 31.1/31/15: Torpor Jr.

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