H: Why don’t you let me run free?
A: Because.
H: Because why?
A: Because you might run off. Then we’d never see you again.
H: Nope. I wouldn’t do that.
A: How do we know this?
H: Because there’s hardly any grass to eat out there.
A: But don’t you want to have your freedom?
H: Look, I’m a very smart horse. My dam Signy told me that I was the smartest foal she ever gave birth to. I know where all the food around here is located.
A: Is that so?
H: Yes. Okay. I’ll strike a deal with you. Open all the barn doors. I mean throw them open wide. And open all the enclosure gates. I mean throw them wide open. Then Raudi, Tinni, and I can come and go at our leisure.
A: And then one day one of you would run out into the road and get hit by a car or truck.
H: Nope. We’re all really car savvy.
A: What about this business of you chasing and kicking out at dogs? I love Ryder and don’t want to see her get hurt again.
H: Keep Ryder up at the house. You do this anyways. She doesn’t need her freedom as much as I do.
A: Nope. Can’t chance it.
H: Why are you asking me what I want if you have no intention of complying with my wishes?
A: Because I thought your request would be more realistic.
H: My request is as realistic as a horse’s request ever gets.
A: Request denied. Any others?
H: Well, let’s see. You’re doing fine in keeping the water buckets full. And we all appreciate your dumping the dregs on the ground before refilling the buckets.
A: Thank you.
H: And you’re doing a really good job keeping the manure picked up.
A: What do you think of all the ground and obstacle work that we’ve been doing lately?
H: I have a good idea.
A: You didn’t answer my question.
H: Mine is still a good idea. Listen up.
A: All right. What is it?
H: You’ve been doling out the treats when we do something right. Why don’t you instead dump them all right here? (Paws black rubber food bucket).
A: Request denied. Just like Raudi and Tinni, you also need to work for a day’s wage.
H: How does the song go?
A: Which song?
H: The wage song.
A: Oh that song. It goes “16 tons and what do I get? Another day older and deeper in debt.”
H: Yes, that’s it. I’m going to be three years old on May 5, 2015. Then I’ll be a mare, just like Raudi.
A: Are you looking forward to this?
H: Oh yes, that is if mares get fed more than fillies.
A: They do.
H: Well then, bring it on!
Next: 309. 11/20/14: Flipping the Day Around |