I recently read a New Yorker article by Elizabeth Kohlbert, in which she suggests that those who contend to be busy are indirectly inflating their sense of self-importance. As I wrote the previous sentence, an image of a person holding on tightly to a dozen Mylar balloons—ones with scowling faces – came to mind.

Maybe those of us who profess to be so busy need to release our balloons and to kick back. I would like to do what the guy in LA did and tie my balloons to a lawn chair before releasing them. I would not then be busy – rather, I’d then be occupied.

What am I going to do today? This is always the question that I consider shortly after waking up. My days are still my own, although I know that this could change in a heartbeat. Change is a constant, a given, a positive thing. Some think that because I’m not currently working for someone else that I should be less busy. The truth of the matter is that I’m as busy, if not busier than those who have real jobs. I just have to deal with the challenges that accompany organizing one’s own day.

For example, today I need to get all the dogs and horses out for exercise. And I need to do this in a way that allows me time to get some gardening done. The hoop house needs work. The plants gotta go in. And the weeds gotta go out.

So I’m now juggling the day’s animal related activities. I am going to take Tinni and the dogs out first because I don’t have time to actually walk the dogs. I usually take Hrimmi out with Tinni, but because she’s becoming increasingly more distracted by grass, I will take her out on a solo walk. After, I’ll work in the hoop house. And when Pete gets home, we’ll take Raudi and Lifre out for a ride. This plan is contingent upon the rain holding off. If it rains, I’ll abandon the animal plan and just work in the hoop house.

It all seems quite simple. It’s not. Dealing with one’s own pieces rather than someone else’s is a form of self-responsibility. There are also the innumerable details that go hand-in-hand with the above. For example, I’ll need to figure out where I’ll take Tinni and the dogs. I have to make sure that I release them a safe distance from the road. And I’m wanting to do groundwork with all the horses, especially Lifre, who needs more self-confidence training.

It’s too bad that I’m not going to get paid for my home-based efforts. A steady income would better enable me to keep this show on the road. And in addition, it would better enable me to appear more legitimate in the eyes of my fellow worker bees. Small drawbacks, but nevertheless, drawbacks.

I once asked a friend why we don’t want to live forever. She thought about this for a minute and then said “because life is such a struggle.” I then conceded that she was right. I later determined that for me, life isn’t so much a struggle as it a challenge. And I would not have it any other way.

Next: 149. 5/30/14: Horse Training: Downhill, Uphill